Yesterday, Dan and I attended a wedding for Natalie Luter and Ian Lopez. Natalie is the little sister of one of my dearest friends, Joanna. I've had the privilege of watching Natalie, from the time she was only six, grow into such a beauty. What a joy it was to celebrate her special day with her!
I knew very few people at the wedding, and Dan knew even less, but I am so glad he came. We have now been married for eight months (wowy!), and it was awesome to be reminded of the vows and the incredible joy involved in the uniting of two lives. Toward the end of the evening Dan and I danced--something we don't normally do--and while he held me in his arms, I was washed anew with love for this man. He had given his life to me. He is mine and I am his!
The last eight months have been a blissful flurry in a way. Time seems to just whizz by. Learning how to share my life with Dan has been so easy in a lot of ways, but there have been difficult moments. I found myself wanting to tell Natalie last night about the highlights of what I have learned...
1. Your marriage is going to need to be protected...from mainly yourself. It is so easy to let other things get in the way of making marriage your first priority. And those other things can leave you tired and drained, with nothing much to offer to your husband.
2. Let your reverence for Jesus Christ trump your reverence for your husband. You husband is human and is going to sin. In those moments when you are feeling hurt or alone or furious, your reverence for Christ can help you not to fall into sin. When you remind yourself that your behavior is a reaction to your reverence for Christ and not to your husband's action, forgiveness and grace is much easier to give.
3. Wake up each morning and ask yourself, "How can I make my husbands day great today?" I have found that my "old self" likes to make more appearances than I would prefer. I am a very selfish creature on my own; I want my needs met and my desires fulfilled. Reminding myself to put Dan's needs/desires above my own is something I need to do every single day. The beauty of this practice is that my giving is often matched by Dan's desire to bless me in return.
So this is what I would like to tell Natalie. Marriage is an incredible gift and a rich journey, but it does take work. But I am learning that the reward of a happy, thriving friendship is well worth it and beyond anything I could have dreamed of.
Congrats, Natalie and Ian!
6 comments:
beautiful green dress you wore ang!
and what a beautiful post about marriage.
what a beautiful bride! Can't believe Nat is married! So wish we could have been there. Love all that you wrote about marriage and what you have learned over the course of these months. Can't believe you guys will celebrate your year anniversary soon! wow.
The maturity of your words are a symphony to a mom's ears. You have learned a lot in 8 mos., some things others won't learn in a lifetime.
Request: I have always loved how you write. Sometime, post your "Bonus Room" essay.
Every good mom will identify with "The Invisible Mom". I hope that you'll be one, someday.
Dan's take is a materpiece!
Blessed Mom <><
Oops! Correction: Dan's TABLE is a masterpiece. Mom <><
i haven't checked your blog for awhile; i think i'd given up hope that you would continue! but, i agree with your mom that you are a good writer and i'm so glad you are back! beautiful and accurate thoughts on marriage. i am currently resonating with your words about reveering Christ first and foremost and seeking Him first, over and above our spouses. you are a wise woman, ang! love you! xoxo
and of course, congrats to Nat! her dress is stunning!! the ruffles on her dress look like icing. :)
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